Comedian Abigail Chay, 67, Throws Herself A 'Living Funeral'; Close Friends Deliver Eulogies

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Veteran comedian Abigail Chay has done something most people would never dream of doing: attend her own farewell ceremony.

The 67-year-old, best known for playing Auntie Abigail in the ‘90s English sitcom Under One Roof, organised a living funeral, or what she called an "Afterlife Farewell Ceremony" on July 10. This took place just before the opening night of Final Destination, the experiential Mandarin talk show she stars in that explores life, death and grief.  

Held at Centre 42, the ceremony featured floral wreaths, a memorial altar decorated with Abigail's portraits, funeral rites and heartfelt eulogies from close friends.

The only difference? Abigail is very much alive.

Speaking to 8days.sg, Abigail revealed she spent most of the ceremony hidden behind a curtain while four close friends — stage director and producer Garrick Wong, paranormal content creator Ah Hao, who’s real name is Lau Su How, actress Joey Swee and filmmaker Kelvin Sng — delivered eulogies. 

She said she was grateful she got to experience her own farewell ceremony, something that wouldn't have been possible after death.

"I actually welled up in tears because I didn't know that I'm being so loved," Abigail said.

The idea wasn't originally hers.

During rehearsals for Final Destination, fellow cast member Joey, 48, had shared that she'd like to hold a farewell party for herself one day.

Abigail, who is two decades older, immediately asked if she could "go first".

"I asked her permission because I didn't want her to think I was stealing her idea," laughed Abigail. "She said, 'Sure, sure!' So I thought, why not? I'm already 67."

Though the farewell ceremony wasn't officially part of the production, Abigail felt it perfectly complemented its themes.

"People who came to support the show could also see that there's nothing fearful about death," she said.

She also hoped to encourage people to talk more openly about afterlife planning, rather than avoid the subject altogether.

Abigail was closely involved in planning the ceremony, choosing a white and pastel floral theme, colours she would also want at her actual funeral.

She also revealed she had already made arrangements for her own funeral about four years ago, purchasing a funeral package complete with an urn niche.

"I've already done all the preparation," she said. "Anytime, everything can be carried out according to my wishes."

She estimated that if it hadn't been sponsored, the farewell ceremony would have cost around $10,000, including venue rental. She believes this is the first of its kind in Singapore.

Not everyone was comfortable with her decision.

Some friends refused to attend because they found it too inauspicious, while others called in tears after receiving the invitation, fearing she had been diagnosed with a terminal illness.

"I had to assure them nothing was wrong," she said. "Some people warned me I was playing with superstition."

Abigail stressed she isn't terminally ill, though recent health challenges and a near-miss accident had made her more conscious of life's unpredictability.

She has been dealing with digestive issues for several years and can no longer swallow fibrous foods, often having to chew and spit them out instead. She also underwent surgery for hernia in 2024 during which doctors removed part of her small intestine.

Last month, she also had a close call when a speeding car narrowly missed her as she was crossing the road.

"I wasn't knocked down, but it brushed past my body," she recalled. "If it had hit me, I think I would have been flattened."

Even so, Abigail admitted she briefly wondered if she was tempting fate by holding the ceremony.

"I kept praying, 'Please don't let anything happen to me these few days,'" she laughed. "Now it's already been four days and I'm still alive."

Far from leaving her feeling morbid, Abigail said the experience left her feeling "resurrected" and with a renewed appreciation for life.

"The old has passed away, behold the new has come," she said.

"I treasure life even more now because I've seen how people appreciate me. The sun seems brighter and the rain seems purer."

She added that hearing loved ones celebrate her while she was still alive was something no actual farewell could offer.

"When my real day comes, I won't be able to hear any of it. This time, I could."

Abigail now hopes others will consider planning ahead for the inevitable and having honest conversations with loved ones while they still can.