Rehome Dog Or Lose Her Boyfriend: Woman's Boyfriend's Mum Says She Must Give Up Her Pet Of 9 Years Before They Move In Together

Would you choose between your fur baby and your partner? For most people, that’s a choice they’d never expect to make. But one woman recently shared that she was handed the ultimatum by her future mother-in-law and took to the Internet to seek advice. 

Recounting her story anonymously in a Malaysia-based Facebook group, she began with a heartbreaking confession: “Tonight, I sat on the floor of my room, watching my dog sleep beside me. As I stroked his head, I couldn’t stop crying. I feel so helpless. I don’t even know if I’m being too emotional.”

The woman owns a nine-year-old Labrador that she has raised since he was just three months old. She shared that he has been a constant companion through some of the biggest challenges in her life.

When she lost her job during Covid-19 when Malaysia was under the Movement Control Order (MCO), she recalled being in a difficult emotional state, with her fur baby providing her with comfort and companionship every day. 

He was also by her side as she grieved the loss of her father, and two years ago, after she returned home from surgery, he slept outside her bedroom door every night “as if he was worried something would happen to her”.

“To many people, he may just be a dog. But to me, he is family. I even jokingly call him my son,” she added. 

Enter her boyfriend, or as you’ll soon see, the problem.

The woman, 33, has been with her 36-year-old boyfriend for over three years. She described their relationship as stable, and as they have started looking at buying a place together, are planning to tie the knot next year. 

Her boyfriend has asthma, but it was never a major concern since they have been living separately. Whenever he visited, she would take extra precautions by cleaning the house, turning on the air purifier, and keeping her dog in another room to reduce fur around the home.

“He’s never really said anything about it all these years,” she added. 

But things began to change once they started discussing moving in together. During a recent visit to his home to meet his family, they also talked about their plans for marriage and buying a house.

The woman was then told by her boyfriend's mother that her dog could not move in with them in the future, leaving her completely stunned.

She also recalled her boyfriend’s mum saying: “My son has asthma. In the future, you two will also want to have children. Having a dog at home means bacteria and fur. How is that suitable? You need to know what matters most. Don’t let a dog mess up your future family.”

The woman said the conversation felt less like a discussion and more like a decision that had already been made, leaving her feeling awkward and caught off guard.

She then looked to her boyfriend for support, only for him to reveal that he had been planning to bring up the issue for some time but was “afraid she’d be upset”.

To make things worse, her boyfriend said: “He’s already old. Maybe you can let someone else take care of him, or ask your siblings to look after him.”

The woman said her heart sank when she heard the suggestion. To her, her fur baby was already a senior dog who could not simply be moved to a new home. He was used to her routines, from the time she came home each day to when he was fed. 

As he grew older and his legs became weaker, sending him away would only force him to adapt to an entirely new environment and owner all over again.

She added: “The hardest part was how casually he said it. It was as if he was talking about throwing away an old sofa. Not sending away a life that had been with me for almost 10 years.”

The couple later had a huge argument, with her boyfriend accusing her of being too emotional. He claimed he was only concerned about her health and questioned whether she was really willing to let a dog affect their future.

Hurt by his words, the woman did not speak to her boyfriend for days.

Her boyfriend’s mother later told relatives that she had “argued with elders over ‘just an animal’”, while his sister also texted her, saying that “marriage requires sacrifices”.

That was when she began questioning everything, wondering whether her feelings truly mattered to them.

“If this was only about the asthma issue, I could understand. I would even be willing to consider solutions, like buying a two-storey house and keeping the dog downstairs, or creating a separate space for him. But from the start, they were never trying to discuss solutions, they simply wanted me to give him up,” she explained. 

Her fear went beyond the issue of her dog. She worried that, in this time, she might be expected to give up other parts of her life, from her work and friendships to her lifestyle choices.

“I’m really lost. On one hand is the person I am preparing to spend my life with, and on the other is my companion who has been with me for almost 10 years,” she wrote.

She knew that choosing to keep her dog could mean losing the relationship, but she also knew that giving him up was something she might never forgive herself for.

She ended her post by asking others what they would do if they were in her shoes.

Unsurprisingly, many netizens were not on her boyfriend’s side. They felt that he should have understood how much her dog meant to her, and that her feelings were not taken into consideration when he put her in such a difficult position without leaving room for discussion.

Others said that it was a “good thing” she had seen her boyfriend’s family’s “true colours” before getting married. They believed the bigger issue was not the dog itself, but how they handled the situation by cornering her and making her feel unsupported.

One netizen even wrote: “I suggest you send the mummy’s boy away instead of the dog.”

Another simply pointed out: “Your dog was there first.”

Those who sympathised with her situation suggested that she consider delaying the marriage until her dog’s later years had passed, but also pointed out that her own recount seemed to show that she had already reached a decision.

We know who we’d be saying goodbye to in her shoes (hint: it’s not the dog), but what would you do?

Photos: Gustavo Fring, Philip Justin Mamelic/ Pexels